23 Years of Anticipation and Finally I’m Back to My Roots
On September 1996, I migrated to the states with my Grandpa and my second eldest brother at the age of three years old.
I was born in the small province in the Philippines to the most all around parents. You want a life of business, hardship, the good times, but most of all the feeling of loneliness. At the age of one years old, my parents had left me with my grandpa Juan (Mother’s dad), brothers and my mom’s siblings; to migrate to America to fulfill “The American Dream”. We lived years without our parents to guide us, but we had my Mom’s siblings who separated us among each other so they can receive the box my parents would send us. The trauma, the aches, and missing the love of our parents has taught me to block out memories in my life to live and to be okay with being alone. My grandpa was the one who took care of me, protected me and always filled the void my heart had. I have three older brothers and I am the only girl. Its hard to be the youngest, the only girl, and the baby. Overprotective was not just a word in my family but a motto. I could never go anywhere without my brother David when we were growing up. In 2013 is when we both went about our own ways and started to figure ourselves out. David is my partner in crime, my Irish twin, but most of all he is my big brother. I have a different relationship with each brother. As our age gap is different, I would be the one who is scolded more, the one who absorbs the anger, and the one who holds well together.
As my family and I migrated to the America was a risk my parents have taken. My parents had to leave us to settle us down in the states. My mom would tell me stories where she would be at work praying and crying for help, to assist, and give her the strength. The years have gone by, by the year of 1996 my parents have found a way for our family to be reunited with each other. We suffered years without our parents, the nurture, the love, and guidance for us to embark in the growing stages of life. My grandpa was my father figure and his favorite. As we started to settle down in America, in our new home and started school. My family and I have grown to love the culture and the life in America; so we’ve decided to make it worthy for us.
From the hardships, the failures, the rumors, and debt my family faced we were still as one. We kept our faith strong and our love for each other stronger. We all face obstacles in life that are different for everyone around you. When we got to America, my 2 brothers and I started to parent ourselves show our independence at ages 8, 5, and 4. Our eldest was having fun with teach us ways of life but the overprotective type. We grew year by year, attitudes were different, the minds were deeper and open, and the way we lived were fearless. Being the youngest and the only girl, I felt like I was the who took care of my brother as I got older. I am a brat, moody, depressed, bitchy, but I have a big heart for all the pain I’ve felt through the years. Every downfall and every trauma I’ve faced and experience I come out stronger for myself.
On August 22,2019; after waiting 23 years being in immigrant in The United States of America; I was sworn in as a United States Citizen at the US District Court Central District at Los Angeles, California. I was alone during my oath taking, like I’ve grown up to be okay with. Most of the major events of my life, I have endured alone and faced the obstacles on my own. As I faced the world on my own, with independence, I have found my voice, who I am supposed to be, and I’ve learned to embrace all my flaws and appreciate what I have in front of me. On August 23, 2019, my parents had booked a ticket for me to accompany my parents home with my sister in law and my niece. August 28, 2019, was the first time I’ve been home since I migrated. It is such a different atmosphere being home and not remembering anything from my childhood. Highways were congested, no one follows the lanes or roads, people selling items to you in your car, kids just run across the street. I enjoyed every moment being home in the Philippines! It was and incredible experience, the heat, the humidity is different. Every areas of the world have parts are just unhealthy, lets not judge each other by our wealth or our bloodlines, but lets just embrace each other and God’s creation.
